Still on pins ...

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Tuesday, April 9, 2013

I am back from my final fling in Florida.  I went down to play a little golf and also to EAT, drink and be merry.  The eating and the drinking were no problem at all.  The golf, not so much.  I played more like Arnold the Pig than like Arnold Palmer. I also ate like him as well. Yessir, I tied on the ol' feedbag like I was going to the chair. I ate at least a school of grouper and a baby cow. And you know I didn't want the local pastry chefs and chocolatiers to feel slighted, so I gave them a good run too. I left no food group unchallenged. If I'm going down, I'm going down in flames baby.

I knew I would have to pay a hefty price for this debaucherous food and drinking binge. And it didn't take long.  I noticed that I developed a waddle at the airport. On top of that, I had to go through the metal detector sideways. And we don't even want to talk about squeezing into the exit row seat.  I was afraid I wouldn't be able to get out of it on time, forcing me to land somewhere like Des Moines and finally be extricated by the maintenance crew.  Fortunately, some Good Samaritan passenger had a tow rope in his carry on that did the trick. Whew!

The final insult was hurled at me by my bathroom scale this morning.  Bleeech.  I wanted to throw up when the final number showed itself. I've only seen numbers like this on the professional bowling tour. The madness has GOT to stop.  And today is Day 1.



As reported to you last week, I have picked up the necessary items to begin the pre-op diet.  I decided that today would be the day regardless if I had a firm surgery date or not.  My plan is to be ready when (if) they get the green light! So today, we began with the liquid breakfast, liquid lunch and dinner fit for a parakeet. Game on.

Oh and by the way.  After I got settled down at the office today, I called Dr. X's office for an update.  I'm on pins waiting to hear if the Howdowenotpay insurance company is going to step up to the plate for this or if I'm going to have to dip into my retirement fund to pay for it. After just receiving terrible news from my tax preparer, I really am in no mood to have to shell out another big check. I was told that the insurance company has all the papers they need and that my request is still in review. Maybe I should have sent them a video of me and my second place ribbon from the Beef-O-Rama last Saturday. 

Check back soon!

jt